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I lift my eyes
from all that is broken
from the ashes of idols
from lies that are spoken
I lift my eyes
from this earthen vessel
from unanswered questions
from the unfulfilling morsels
I lift my eyes
the window of my soul
to the heaven’s Creator
to The One who has control
I lift my eyes
where my Faith will be made sight
at His appearing I will see
The Defender and Lover of my soul
has His eyes on me
A silent prayer to the close of night
bloodied and battered in the morning light
No more walls or secret places
ashes to the wind from trash to Grace…
The ribbons of sadness all broken away
Redemption’s song the melody of the day
I will meet you at the road and the sky
over the edge I will let my spirit fly…
Turn my mourning into dancing
I clap my hands with the rocks and tree
The Benediction to the new day coming
a wedding feast for my Beloved and me…
Well I tried to make it Sunday
but that ocean tide came calling
I stopped on the way for some Tupelo honey
just know my soul needs healing…
My Angels have grown older now
though they do not tire of my journey
they bring comfort to my soul
they guard me in my worry…
There are no words needing to be spoken
there is no darkness I cannot face
I will sit beside the ocean blue
and for a time it will be a resting place…
I feel I am my best self when I write. To portray life as it is as well as it should or could be. I suppose that is what a painter feels as well or a dancer, a sculptor…
Writing brings me a contentment in the moment not feeding the future or regretting the past. Sometimes when I hear or read a string of words together my ears perk up like when the wind whispers in them.
I know that I’m not saying anything new but for me writing feels like the process of the sea’s relentless movement or the running river water as they both over time smooth the sharp edges off of broken glass or a rock and reshape them into something beautiful to behold.
I know most things never change but to attempt to express a feeling or fragrance or a picture using words is my passion.
Here is an example of what I am saying…
Wisteria grew along the weathered splintered gray fence that had long been forgotten. The fragrance of the wisteria permeated the bright spring day and it made her feel lightness in her heart that she had not experienced in a long while. She thought about how precious her memories of first love are for there-in lies treasure in the pleasure and the pain…
I feel a story coming on…to be continued I hope.
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
(“Rachmones”:this is a Hebrew word for womb…It is the definition of a compassion as deep and as undeniable as what a mother feels for her child). A little set up for the journal essay below…love you and your family.
I got up very early on Sunday morning and sat on a bench in the park…I wondered what it would be like to leave my Christian self and shrug off the garment of My Lord’s bloody cloak. I remember standing up and bowing to my knees. The stillness and holiness of that place brought to my mind the word’s “Lord have mercy… “Chrieste eleison.” Then I thought of the former life I had shed because of Christ and how he had withheld his anger from me and has shown me His Mercy. The Yiddish word for Mercy is “rachmones”, whose root is “rechem” the Hebrew word for womb.
Myself being a mother and now a grandmother I am sure once again that God is my father and my mother, the silent mother of mercy, if you will. In his transcendence He is not limited in any way. I know that I could no sooner cease being a Christian then I can cease being me…So I picked up my bloody cloak of Jesus Christ and put it back on gladly. I pray that if anyone sees anything at all the rest of my life it will be God, the silent mother of Mercy, Rachmones.
So brilliant now the sunlit skies
that old sweet blindness passing by
A woman-child knows fruitless times
all dressed up in lace and rhymes…
Let silver lanterns lead the days
Of ones who journey through the ages
To nurture wildness is to be wise
Let silver lanterns by our guide.
You think you want to drink that cup?
Then you don’t know where the wine comes from.
You think you know the Devil’s take?
You arrogance is a deadly mistake.
Don’t pontificate on your good deeds
Your religion of outside “looks”
You want to be like Jesus Christ?
then drink the wine of forgiveness tonight.
I lie down under the burden
of the courage that I lack
For you to see the sin in me
cannot be taken back
It is my greatest fear at times
you might finally know
The dark and filth I tasted once
I never want to show
Exposure of who I really am
could drive your love away
After all you’re only human
dare I hope that you would stay?
The truth of exposure that I do not fear
is a mystery not of loss
but a debt that is paid fully
willingly hung upon the Cross
I dreamed I saw a million angels flying saying something about the King.
There were children singing and mountains falling into the empty Sea.
Who will it be, who will it be, is the Holy One finally come?
Look for the Evil one’s dying day for the End has just begun.
I was kneeling at an alter of burning dreams there was a red moon in the Sky.
There were mothers crying and babies dancing yet no one there could die.
How can it be, how can it be, will the damage be undone?
Look at the Sword He holds in his hands, it blazes like the Sun.
I dreamed I heard Purity and Fury thunder and the earth split wide in two.
There were graveyards rolling and a clear voice calling, “wake up, I have come for you.”
When will it be, when will it be, has the Kingdom finally come?
Look toward the heavens and you just may see Him before the day is done.
